Growth...

For the first time in a long time I can see the direction that my life needs to go. I have grown in ways I couldn't have imagined but have stood still when it comes to love. I’m now starting to see the type of love that I need but I’m unsure if the person I love is willing to provide. I’m not one to use the term “do this or else” but I am tired of half-assing my relationship. I need a strong commitment. I need to know at the end of the day despite all differences you have my back and at this time I don’t have that. I know it’s possible to achieve, that’s why I still have faith in this relationship but I don’t feel the effort in our love. So what do I do…
I thought about going head first with my plan and pray she follows but that’s our problem now we both are in our own worlds dealing with our own problems and not listening to each other. Part of me want to just sit down and put everything out on the table and say look…by this date if we are not coming together then it’s best that we grow apart BUT we been there and done that and that didn’t work.
When you think of the perfect love you think of peace, harmony, comfort, and growth. We have none of the above. We have headaches, broken promises, bruises and frustration. Is this a perfect love in progress or love gone wrong? I’m serious…I need help. I even started seeing a counselor just so I can start understanding my feelings and my needs.
It’s time for us to get real because neither of us is getting younger and I’m tired of fighting!!!